Observations By Myself

Wednesday, August 12, 2009
  • This is just a list of sentences for some reason.
  • It’s because I have many observations.
  • What if the universe is in a petri dish?
  • If the world were in reverse, cows would be barbequing (uh-huh) humans.
  • I like apple pie a la mode.
  • I was never any good at playing Asteroids for some reason.
  • End of the world scenarios:
  1. Nuclear holocaust
  2. Asteroids
  3. Gamma Ray Burst
  4. Mr. T stepping on Chuck Norris’ toes accidentally. And at that time they’re on bad terms and 40 feet tall. And have beards made of fire.
  5. Zombie apocalypse (the most fun-sounding)

But no matter what the apocalypse, I think it’d be fun to have a post-apocalyptic blog. If I haven’t been incinerated, zombified or engulfed in flaming beard. That blog stuff would be there forever, you know? Imagine when the human race has ended, a new species arises. An operational computer would be a great discovery. That is, if they learned the language somehow, of course (Google Translate?). And now, I’m imagining what they would think of this blog…

“This Chuck Norris… This Mr. T… They must have been deities. They must be eternal and all-powerful. WE MUST WORSHIP THEM.”

They would be right, obviously. I can see it now. A religious war, on one end the T-ists, on the other the Chuck-lims.

That’d be awesome.

chuck_norris

By the way, pictures are linked to their sources.

Up next: music


Chuck At 5% Power

Sunday, September 21, 2008

You wanna mess with him?

Thanks.


The Most Awesome Blog In The Universe

Sunday, September 14, 2008

New! The Awesome Squad now has a group posting blog with at least 5 posters. I suggest that all Awesome Squad members, and those not in the squad post this link in their blogrolls:

The Awesome Squad

It’s not perfect yet, but it is awesome. Go now or be pitied, roundhouse kicked, and pitied some more. Membership is open, as always.


WE WANT YOU!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

I don’t need to announce that Mr. T was in the Awesome Squad… Mr. T is the Awesome Squad, and he wants people to register to join the awesome squad. Included is knowing that you just joined the most awesome squad ever.

Included is a super awesome point system.


Chuck Norris Has Arrived

Sunday, August 17, 2008

The Awesome Squad is almost all together.

First video.

Second video.

Billy Mays is expected to arrive on Tuesday.


The Awesome Squad

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Now we only need Chuck Norris and Billy Mays.

Thanks.


The Zombies Were Having Fun

Monday, July 28, 2008

Monsterday 9: Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is! Height and weight added!

Name: Androidus Wingus; Winged Android Monster

Height/Weight: 3’5″/436 lbs.

Attitude: The latest in security systems (from a small company called Cyberdyne), this “monster” will allow access to guarded places (No, not the secret comment page) by asking a question that only those qualified to know the answer can gain access to guarded areas.

Example of Speech: “Does Fluffy like lime tacos?”

Traits: Since my blog is obviously a military installation, you’ll see this monster over at the main gate. If incorrect answers are given by someone 3 times, this monster will use the robotic eye to shoot a bolt of energy that paralyzes its victim to allow for containment and interrogation courtesy of Mr. T. If the target tries to run, the monster will fly to pursue them.

Name: Triangulus Jawluss Standardus; Standard Jawless Trianguloid (Egyptian Variety)

Height/Weight: 5’2″/134 lbs.

Attitude: Doesn’t say much, much like this description.

Example of Speech: “crappo”

Traits: Go ahead. See if your head can fit into his mouth. I dare you. No, there are no teeth! (shifty eyes)

Name: Overconfidus Hornus Multiplies Tenteclus; the Multi-Eyed Overconfident Tentacled Horned Monster

Height/Weight: 2’3″/67 lbs.

Attitude: Incredibly confident, this monster thinks that it can take Chuck Norris.

Example of Speech: “I just kicked Chuck’s butt last week. I’ll do it again. See if I don’t.”

Traits: This monster can constrict its victims, it can use a horn attack, it can leer at you with its eyes, and it can get angry and use an attack out of fury. Anybody here work for the Pokemon Company? No? Good.

Note: This monster is now extinct.

And since I didn’t get much of a response to the interactive thing…

Name: Brownus Blobbus Arachnus; Brown Blob Spider (submitted by panascakes)

Height/Weight: 1’3″ tall/20 oz.

Attitude: It is a heavy drinker so whenever it speaks it tends to replace a word with something beer related. (submitted by panascakes)

Example of Speech: “woot its chug norris”

Traits: Like all spiders, this monster can spin a web. The tuft of fur on top of the blobular form is the creator of the black web. Being a pretty big spider (with robotic arms), you definately don’t want this thing crawling on your face. The brown coloring allows for it to blend in to tree bark. Rather than having a poison (it has no teeth), it tends to completely engulf mice and rats and dissolve them with acidic saliva. Ouch.

Anybody want a monsterday button? If you use WordPress, create a text widget and post this code, replacing the1st parenthese with the less than symbol and using the greater than symbol instead of the parenthese at the end.

(img src=”https://finickypenguin.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/monsterday.jpg” )

You end up with this.

Any new button ideas? Just tell me!