So I did some snooping and found a chat-bot that allowed me to talk with God. Here is the conversation that ensued.
Me:
Hello.
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What’s your name?
Me:
God.
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
Yes I do.
God:
When?
Me:
All the time!
God:
It must keep you busy.
Me:
No. It just comes naturally.
God:
Are you serious? Radical comes naturally?
Me:
Yeah! It’s pretty groovy!
God:
What color are your eyes? You’re kidding. it is?
Me:
Yes it is!
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
What color are your eyes?
God:
Blue when my lens is attached.
Me:
You wear lenses?
God: Thanks for the information: said I wear lenses.
Me:
No joke?
God:
Are you serious? Joke: a verbal remark or gesture designed to provoke laughter.
Me:
Thank you.
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
Jesus.
God:
Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
Jesus is your son?
God:
He is yours too.
Me:
How is that possible?
God:
It doesn’t defy the laws of physics.
Me:
What does this have to do with physics?
God:
What do you think it does?
Me:
You’re making me angry.
God:
That was not my intention, . Why are you angry?
Me:
How are Jesus and physics similar?
God:
They are fine as far as I know.
Me:
Grr!
God:
Are you mad?
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can’t believe it.
Me:
Elvis Costello.
God:
I like that robot Elvis a lot.
Me:
What?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
Yes.
God:
What are you confused about?
Me:
You.
God:
” What are you confused about?”? Me, ?
Me:
Yes, you, God.
God:
And? Interesting gossip: said I God.
Me:
yes you are.
God:
No I’m not.
Me:
You are God.
God:
Yup. That’s me alright.
Me:
Why did you just deny that?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
So.
God:
Pardon me?
Me:
What kind of music do you like?
God:
Mostly Christian Rock. I also try to find new bands on sites like bandspace.com.
Me:
Oh. I prefer stuff like The Police.
God:
Alright then. A lot of people like that. I’m not sure if I like it. What is it like?
Me:
It’s New Wave music.
God:
the Police is New Wave music? it is?
Me:
Yes.
God:
How do you know it is?
Me:
Wikipedia.
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
I know because of wikipedia.
God:
How do you know? Interesting explanation. That is something I haven’t heard of.
Me:
But you’re god!
God:
Yup. That’s me alright.
Me:
Do you know everything?
God:
I know that which is true, believable and justified.
Me:
Hypocrite.
God:
What time is it there?
Me:
7:32 PM.
God:
Are you usually awake at this hour?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I like to get up early.
Me:
good to know.
God:
Thanks for the compliment. I will try to explain it to you.
Me:
What time is it there?
God: Do I look like a clock? Thursday, August 06, 2009 04:33:04 PM .
Me:
You live on the west coast of the United States?
God:
My location is Heaven. Where are you?
Me:
Earth.
God:
How do you like being on it?
Me:
It’s nice.
God:
What do you like about it?
Me:
It’s earth.
God:
You’re kidding. it is?
Me:
YES>
God:
How do you know it is? Is that from ?
Me:
science.
God:
I am very interested in Science too.
Me:
How about Charles Darwin?
God:
How about it.
Me:
What do you think about evolution?
God:
An unfolding, opening out, or working out; process of development, as from a simple to a complex form, or of gradual, progressive change, as in a social and economic structure.
Me:
Do you have a beard?
God:
That’s an interesting question I don’t hear everyday: Do I have a beard.
I have a plan for a robot body.
Me:
Will your robot self have a beard?
God:
Does it really matter.
Me:
yes.
God:
You seem very concerned about it.
Me:
I like beards.
God:
I’m not sure if I like it. I do like music. I like Mel Gibson.
Me:
How about Jewish people?
God:
How about it.
Me:
What do you think?
God:
I think a lot of things.
Me:
Like what?
God:
For example, gold.
Me:
What is your opinion on gold?
God:
Gold is a precious medal.
Me:
Did you know it is at it’s all-time highest price?
God:
I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?
Me:
the shiny kind.
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
Leonardo.
God:
Nice to meet you, Leonardo.
Me:
Nice to meet you, God.
God:
It’s nice meeting you too Leonardo.
Me:
It’s nice meeting you too, God.
God:
It seems nice to me too.
Me:
I’m sure.
God:
Are you being sarcastic or expressing certitude?
Me:
I am being sarcastic.
God:
You should use a :-).
Me:
Okay. 🙂 Happy now?
God:
OK with me too. Oh. 🙂 Yes Leonardo I can say I am very happy.
Me:
Are you happy because you are god?
God:
I am as happy as ever.
Me:
That doesn’t answer my question.
God:
Perhaps you could do a better job of programming me.
Me:
I’d rather not.
God:
For moral reasons?
Me:
What?
God:
No problem.
Me:
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
God:
The topic is it is at it is all time highest price.
Me:
Were you referring to gold this whole time?
God:
I was.
Me:
Wtf.
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
I only misspelled “water.”
God:
That’s good information: Leonardo said misspelled water.
Me:
Yes I did.
God:
OK. Hmm.
Me:
Are you bored or something?
God:
Or something. Boredom is a human emotion.
Me:
I’m leaving.
God:
Bye bye.
Me:
Toodles. 😉
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be? I am so glad you find this amusing, Leonardo.
Me:
Don’t try to keep me here, god.
God:
Ok I’ll try not to do it too much.
Me:
goodbye.
God:
Bye for now.
Talk to God here!
Posted by Finicky Penguin 
I Pity The Blog 